10 days ago...

The following story happened exactly 10 days ago...

It was around 10h30pm or 11pm. I've just finished the final exam of my spanish course, got the result which was as expected and heading to my home full of joy. I missed that feeling for a long time, feeling of self content, after achieving something, feeling of relief after hard work (ok i'm exagerating in that last thing, i didn't study hard at all)...
so, like after any class, i walk about 5 minutes to a nearby metro station to go home (metro is really good since it doesn't take time with all the traffic on the roads especially when not crowded). i was in the 1st car, dedicated for the ladies, everything was normal till a guy with his wife and kid stepped into the wagon. One young girl protested, and began to shout, it's againts the rule, he should go off the wagon.. another one disagreed saying when it's late at night there is no such rule... and so one, the more times passes, the more their voices became louder, till they almost fought with hands. everybody else was just indifferent, some were laughing, some not paying attention. i was surprised, why when someone is talking about something right nobody cares? i didn't mind that this family came or not, i was just thinking about what are the rules and they are followed or not. it's a way of living, by or off the rules. most of the people out there didn't like the young girl who overreacted cos someone broke the rules.
i didn't do also what i should do, i just kept silence, watching what's going on.. i'm not proud of myself, i was just afraid to say something, to get caught into something.. i was upset for spoiling my happy moment... and i got off the metro, wondering about the whole situation.

Back

i didn't write for a long time, convincing myself that i should only write when something touches me and that's all.... then days passes, months passes, and i don't post anything, waiting for something to shake me to write.. so i lost the main reason why i began this blog in the first place.
it doesn't matter what i write about, big or small, happy or sad. i don't have to lock everything inside myself, i should let it go.
so for who believed in me, who encouraged me, this is for you.

My laptop is a TERRORIST

For those who use the underground these days, they have probably noticed the increased security, searching bags for people going inside..
This is good, i don't mind it since it concerns the safety of people and it is the normal thing now in the world, though sometimes it makes me feel that we live in an insecure world.
After finishing something in Dokki, i headed to the metro station over there... i was stopped by a guy asking to look in the bag i carry, which i got used to it lately.. the guy ironically asked me what is this, laptop? i afirmed it, so he told me it is prohibited.. what? he offered me to go to talk with the officer inside. so i went, since i won't lose a thing... anyway i headed to the office where he was sitting, i asked him why is that, he just said we got orders and we have to obey them. so i just told them they should tell that people are upset with this decision but i guess the mentality won't change, orders are to be followed not discussed.
i left the station, very furious, but i decided not to just give up. i decided to take the risk so i walked to the following station at the opera. it isn't very far and i used to walk that distance though i was tired carrying my laptop bag under the sun (i'm still so red after my one day trip to Alex). on my way i was thinking what if i face the same situation and they don't allow me to go in, then i would have done all this for nothing, why not just take a taxi to home... but i just kept walking. i finally arrived at the opera station, i entered without being stopped by anyone, not even searching my bag!!!
i was relieved but, if there were orders, shouldn't they be followed without exceptions everywhere? isn't the opera an important place or cos rarely people use that station?
lot of questions but above all, how far things can go? will we face the day we won't be able to walk on the street cos we r afraid? will the day come when everyone is supsected till he proves the contrary? is the world going to be more crazy than it is right now?

Hope

Hope is a big word carrying lot of feelings.. hope is the source of energy that makes us able to go further, to carry on with life.. it makes u able to set goals and looking forward to achieve them..
i passed through a period where i have lost it, it was like dying slowly without noticing it, vanishing as if not existing. it takes a lot of will to get back hope, to turn upside down the situation.. sometimes a little thing reminds us with this hope that we once had, a little conversation makes u reevaluate urself, a book that makes u open ur eyes to see the light..
let us move a step forward, let us get back hope to our life...

stories and thoughts

Sharing:
a little girl, in the metro, with her mom and younger sister. the first thing she did when she opened package of buiscuits is giving a piece to a little boy sitting with his mom next to her.

Sun:
i had a day off yesterday. i took advantage to do some errands. it took me hours but i enjoyed it. walking in the street, the sun is shining (even if it was very hot), walking on the Kasr El Nil bridge.. it has been long time since i did something similar, i forgot the feeling of freedom (freedom from life).

Friends:
I went out with my friends yesterday night. They made a surprise for me and another friend, for our birthdays. i was touched, not cos of the surprise, but cos even though life takes us apart, we r still trying to stay in touch.

Decision:
I decided to change the way i live. Lately i was caught in the routine of work-home, i forgot things i used to enjoy. I was full of energy, now i feel like i'm empty person. It's time to open a new page in my life.

Korba Festival

Korba Festival or Spring Festival or whatever it is named.. It was a nice experience. They closed Baghdad street in Korba, only pedestrians. on both sides of the streets, tables, people eating, drinking, buying stuff.. kids with their parents drawing on the street with chalks or paintings. You can see people of all ages, the old and the young, the rich and the poor. There was a little parade but actually just few cars with little decorations for the sponsor, not impressive at all. Only 2 bands played on stage. I believe that if they made it from morning, with different bands to play, it would be more interesting, to discover different types of music. I don't say it wasn't nice, on the contrary, Wust el Balad performed and they were really great.

There are 2 things that really touched me, the place, you could feel that you are transported to a strange, with all th placee specific architecture of El Korba, and the ambiance in the place. It was very charming. The 2nd thing is that i really had a great time with my brother, it has been long time that we didn't do something together. i enjoyed it a lot and somehow i forgot what i was missing. It was a nice day though i wished for a better ending.

can you find the ressemblance?

it's my life

It's my life
It's now or never
I ain't gonna live forever
I just want to live while I'm alive

listening to this song among others, looking through the window at people in the streets, as if i am in a small glass ball watching the world going round while i'm away from everything, nothing in my mind, no worries, no thoughts... just me out there.
try to enjoy one moment every now and then cos sometimes we forget to enjoy living and we end up in the endless loop of life.

Iraq after 4 years...

Today, my aunt who is living till now in Baghdad and 2 of my cousins arrived to Egypt. I was so excited to meet them and get to know them, after all those years (can't say i knew them, we were so young last time we met).
i only passed about 2-3 hours with them today, but it was enough to feel strange. really, what i heard today is beyong any thinking. i can't imagine how they are living, and how they are telling all those stories as a normal thing.
i decided to tell some of them, even if it is not so nice, cos the truth must be told, the stories of the common iraquis must be heard.
i'm sorry if i'll make you more depressed, or more upset, but i just feel i must do this.

i don't know from what to begin, just imagine that they don't have electricity (it would be great if 1 hour in the day), it is freezing, no heat, no light. it is not safe to be outside from 3pm. what is the life if u can't do anything, when u don't have the luxury that normal people have or should have, to just feel safe when u go to work or university, to walk on the street with no fear, to be able to sleep in ur bed knowing that nothing can harm u.

one of my uncles, when going to jordan by bus, el kaeda members stopped the bus and asked if there are any shiites.. well, they asked them to pray, to make sure that they are all sunnis as they said. they would kill if shiit. they took my uncle (who is christian), and held him for a night. anyway nothing happened to him thank God. the "amir" of this group is a 22 years old Saudi guy. Do u know that one to be "amir", has just to kill 10 people to get this title.

it is not safe to go from a place to another, people make false papers, so if i a sunni area, they have paper with sunni last name, or the contrary if going to shiite area. no where is safe, no one is safe. Is this democracy they r shouting night and day in the news and in every interview? i doubt. it is as my brother said, the democracy to kill anyone.
do u know that in some places, they go to a house and kick people living in it, with nothing but their cloth, just to make the area theirs.

i am still under chock of what i heard. i knew the situation was so bad, but when meeting my relatives and hear it from them is totally different than hearing it on the news (though even the news, don't tell details about the normal, average, iraquis).

i'll stop now cos i have nothing more to say

12 days of the Year (to be continued)

On the 1st day of the year,
my boss has asked me
to create the dummy neighbours

On the 2nd day of the year,
my boss has asked me
to create the CSV files
to create the dummy neighbours

On the 3rd day of the year,
my boss has asked me
to use my laptop
to create the CSV files
to create the dummy neighbours

On the 4th day of the year,
my boss has asked me
to try shisha
to use my laptop
to create the CSV files
to create the dummy neighbours

On the 5th day of the year,
my boss has asked me
not to sleep early
to try shisha
to use my laptop
to create the CSV files
to create the dummy neighbours
______________________________________________________
Notes:
I began to write this when i had the flue
"My boss" just for the rhythm of the song only, no hard feelings :)
"dummy neighbours" and "CSV" are work terminology

Goodbye 2006

I didn't really want to talk about my 2006, but as it was my idea in the 1st place here and Blue started it, so here i am.

What i would like to achieve in 2007 is to determine what i want for my life. i know it sounds big, but really i discovered when facing some personal issues that i simply don't know... it is an important question to answer, yet the answer is not as simple as that. it may take a year or two, but at least what i wish is to be on the right track.

2006 was a special year, full of joyful and less joyful events. what had impacted me the most is my trip to jordan, with its ups and downs... i'm thankful that i was able to do it before it's too late.

xmas spirit

i don't know why i feel happy. maybe it is the xmas spirit.... anyway it feels good.
hope u catch it too :)

foggy (not froggy)

this morning, while going to work in the bus as i do everyday, things were different. it was very crowded, we took longer time cos of the fog and the accidents (on the me7war).
it was very strange, to see fog so intense, even when looking through the window, i felt it, the air was whity, not clear.. i felt that it is like my life, i can't see what's ahead of me like this morning i couldn't see the adds on the sides of the road. the road exists, and we just roll on ahead, following the flow.. is life like this, following the flow, going on the one track that i can't see where it leads? then at the sudden, i discover myself in a totally strange place, not knowing how i arrived there, feeling lost. lost and stranger, in the middle of noisy life, not able to catch the singing of birds, the whistle of the wind. the wind travels from place to place, carrying all feelings of the earth, people, and living beings. it should carry hope, love and peace, but all i can see is a storm turning me upside down, or should i say it is the storm inside me. what is in me? all i see is emptiness, nothing. like the car on the road in the middle of the fog, i'm trapped in the emptiness of myself...

Goodbye

Rien / Nothing

Qu'y a-t-il de plus jouissif que de s'arrêter de penser? Cesser enfin ce flot débordant d'idées plus ou moins utiles ou plus ou moins importantes. S'arrêter de penser! Comme si on était mort tout en pouvant redevenir vivant. Etre le vide. Retourner aux origines suprêmes. N'être même plus quelqu'un qui ne pense à rien. Etre rien. Voilà une noble ambition.

extrait du livre "Les Fourmis" de Bernard Werber

Translation
What is more enjoying than stop thinking? to finally cease all those ideas flowing more or less useful, more or less important. Stop thinking! As if we had died while being capable to become alive again. To be the vacuum. Return to the supreme origins. Not to be someone who doesn't think of nothing. To be nothing. This is a noble ambition.

from the book "the Ants" by Bernard Werber


I was reading this book the past few days, and this passage just moved me... maybe cos i have lot of free time to think these days, and sometimes wondering too much about an issue makes it hard, cos u end up asking too many questions, not knowing the answer, not knowing what to do cos obviously thinking too much leads u to several roads and at the end u don't know which one to choose.

adventures = ?

r u curious about the answer? try to guess...
well it is difficult, since what i'm going to say doesn't happen a lot.
ok, here is my little story, for u it will be very funny, and u'll say the poor girl, what a luck!
Here is the whole story... just don't laugh too much :)
everyday i come back to the hotel, i notice a small pizzeria near it, on the corner of the street. by the way pizzerias and taxi phone (shop for talking on the phone) r everywhere in Algeria.
I decided today, since i was a little hungry and well i thought it would be nice to go out for a little on my own, to go and have lunch there.
There was a even a movie on the tv, and i wanted to see it, but i told myself i have to go out, not stay in the hotel as almost everyday.
so, i went out and.. as soon as i stepped out in the street, it began to ran. i decided, it just just 2 steps, i can just walk quickly and arrive at the pizzeria, and have dinner and hopefully rain will stop by then. actually, things didn't go as planned. first in the few mintues i walked, i was like drowned. i always try to look to the bright side, i don't get to walk under heavy rain a lot in cairo.
but sometimes the bright is too bright that it makes u so blind and u see it dark. well it wasn't only the rain. there is a cafeteria beside the pizzeria, i just entered for shelter from the rain, and well thought i can find something to eat like sandwich or a meal. well, i was surprised that they told me there is no food, no sandwich, no french fries, nothing except croissant and drinks. they told me if i come earlier, at 3-4pm, there will be but since it is 5h30pm, everything is finished. it is so weired. in egypt, any cafe, u find food anytimes, sometimes u ask for something and there is not, but i never faced a situation like that.
anyway i decided to take a croissant and a pepsi, and to wait for the rain to stop. i waited about an hour, sitting on a chair that is not very stable, watching the sky, feeling like i'm out of the picture. it was crowded, no girls or women, young guys talking loud... and i just was sitting there thinking my sense of adventure got me to that point... then i rememberd a friend telling me that he doesn't like the number 13. i don't believe in that stuff, but at this moment, i just smiled and told myself, he is right today ;-)
well it ended that the rain became light, so i just walk out back to the hotel. and i'll probably have a yogourt or cereale for the dinner tonight.
see.. this is what adventures lead to :-)

Destination Kourou 99

7 years ago, from 5/9 till 14/9, i had the most wonderful trip of my life.
it all began in the year 1998/1999. it was a competition between schools, and at the end, we were 9 winners, from 9 schools.
we didn't just win a 10 days trip, we won something more important, friendship, which is priceless.
i can't believe that it has been actually 7 years since we travelled. i still remember our first meeting, we barely knew each other, we were gathered by fate.
now, after 7 years, we graduated from universities, we have different carriers... each one of us had his own life but, we still have this common thing that bond us together, Kourou.
we shared great memories together, even after our return to egypt, with the famous Tomber la Chemise ;)
I miss u all, i wish i was there to celebrate.

Egyptians in the eye of Algerians

i heard many things from algerians i met about egyptians & egypt..

the most funny one is that egyptians have a big table on breakfast, eat a lot of things. and this comment was by many, not one only. they have this picture from the egyptian movies.
when i tell them that i eat bigger breakfast in hotel here than in egypt, they were surprised.
breakfast for algerians, just coffee and maybe croissant.

algerian women like to watch egyptian series (el mosalsalat). it is very important for them.
so u can imagine what is the idea about egypt.
this is the reason why it is more easy for algerians to understand egyptians rather than the contrary.

they see egypt as a big country, with a big civilization.
very crowded, live and noisy.

egyptians still preserve their identity. u see cos of the colonization by the french, they got a lot of things from the french. it affected everything from the style of life till even the language, all algerians speak french, and they use it daily also, not only arabic.

Road to Algeria

I heard that Algeria is a nice country to visit, but you should see it yourself to judge.
But to get there, it is not easy, especially if your flying in Algerian Airways. At the ticket office, they told me to be at the airport 3 hours before the flight, i think they should have said, 2 hours after the flight. ok i'm exagerating a little, but our flight was delayed 1h30. we were supposed to fly at 16h15, they annouced boarding at 17h00, we took off at 18h45 (you never forget exactly the time of everything if you are in that kind of situations.. lol)
Anyway, i thought that it was some kind of emergency that caused that delay... but i found at later that this is the normal, the plane is always delayed 1 hour at least.
The plane was very small, very crowded, no entertainment at all, no TV (only screens to see where we are in earth, to wish to just arrive as soon as possible), even no radio (this is the least in the aeroplanes, for a 4 hour trip).
The only good thing that made me forget all about that, was the good company. i was sitting next to the corridor, on my right, was a young woman and her mother, both algerians, on the other side of the corridor was a young girl, 19 years old, algerian too.
it made the trip totally different, we talked about everything, about differences between our cultures, it is very interesting.
We finally arrived, landing was a little bit hard, but we made it safely. there was a funny thing, my friends warned me that algeriansw will get up and open the hatch for hand luggage, before the plane is completely parked. and they did, and the crew had to just ask everybody to sit down several times.
anyway after finishing the passport thing and get my passport, went out to look for the driver that was supposed to pick me up. well i found a guy with a paper written on it the name of the company but with a name of another guy. so i asked him is there another driver from the company, he answered no, i asked if he knew there would be someone waiting for me, negative answer too. i went to try and look for someone else, didn't find, so i returned back again to ask, he said he is waiting for a guy. so since i had colleagues in algeria, i just contacted them and they told that the driver is in the airport. you won't believe this... it was that guy, he was supposed to pick me and 2 other guys, and had even my name in the schedule.. i don't know if he thought my name was a boy's name or what.. anyway finally after maybe an hour, we left the airport just me and one of the guys, the 3rd one whose name was on the paper didn't show up.
so.. after that long day, sleeping was the best to do :)

to be continued

Back

I officially announce Foggy's World in the new look.
Also i can say that Froggy is back :)