i just want to say that for the coming period, i won't be able to post a lot here, cos i'll be really busy in the study for the next couple of months.

Rememberance

The 1st annual of my grandmother (it's supposed to be 2/2 but usually it is done a month earlier there, in iraq)
This photo was taken today.
I think this is the least thing i can do, to ask that you pray for her.
I didn't know her as i should, i just remember some little things, long time ago. I remember when i was visiting family there, me, my bro and my cousins were playing together, i think playing pirates or sailors, and we put chairs and tables upside down on the floor, and she came and was angry about that.
I remember when she came to egypt, 15 years ago, and she was staying a little time with my other grandmother and it was the 1st time i have both together and i call them both teta, so it was strange.
I heard that she has strength when she was suffering (she had cancer) and not complaining about anything and that she had rest when she passed away cos the last period was so difficult, but sometimes the person is selfish, as i was praying that she lives till i can see her and at the same time i didn't want her to suffer.
There are many things i wish i could have done, i know some were impossible and not in my hands, but still it's sometimes like feeling guilt that i could have done this or that but i didn't.
I hoped that the war would end soon so i can go and see her before she dies but this wish was impossible, and still 2 years after the war, things are even worse there.
I'm still hoping that things will get better soon, all we can do is just pray.

Try to guess what it is.. it's blue and white.. moving fast..
P.S i took it with the camera, i didn't edit it, it's like that.

Robocon insight

I won't talk about the competition itself but about what is behind the scenes..
(for the people who don't know, robocon is a competition of robots constructed by students from different univerisities)
I went there 2 days, sunday and monday cos my brother was participating and also a team from my promotion at univ, today the round of 16 is held.

it may seem strange what i'm going to say next, but it really moved me.

the 2nd day, i went alone first (my mom came later), i was sitting in the stadium where the competition was held, waiting for the beginning of the competition. i was in the 1st row, right behind the fence. there was a tissu hanging from it to the floor. a worker came and he was adjusting every part, no one would have cared about it adjusted or not, no one would have noticed it, but yet he was doing it with precision.

how many of us do his job with all his heart and doing his best even if knowing that no one is watching or it is not a big thing to be done?

2 different attitudes: after a match was finished, winning team greeting the other team (this scene was rarely).
after another match, one of the loosing team threw away the thing he was wearing (i think he has to be disqualified cos it is not the spirit of sport).

how many times when we are so angry with someone or with ourselves we act without reflection and in an agressive way?

People in the stadium, cheering with loud voice, different students from different universities, government and private. it was nice to see the entousiasm but... sometimes it crossed the lines (not in a bad way but still i didn't like it) .

a small group from my faculty came to encourage the team, not only that but they were helping them too in their robot, this was really great to see, i was very happy about it, this is the spirit we need.i This was also for other teams, especially some teams from same univ, they were helping each other, passing their tools, even asking for help).

well, that's all i can remember now, last thing i want to say is that i'm happy to see all those students participating, 41 teams from different universities, in cairo and outside cairo.
it was difficult for some of the teams, working hard for months, to loose in 6 min (2 matches) but i think they gained more than this loss, the experience, the joy and passion to make something, the friends they got to know... etc

Right or wrong?

Today i was in the CTA, from heliopolis returning back to home.
I waited for a long time, about 30 minutes. so of course, the one that arrived was very crowded, and people are standing up. i wanted to return back at home as soon as possible cos i was going to the opera. Anyway, while i was standing up, i heard 2 ladies, also standing up talking together. One said this is wrong, the driver should not allow people more than the seats, and everytime he stops to take more the people shout and say no place. Well the point is, it is against regulation, so the driver should not do that. but also i think it is our fault, the passengers, cos we agree on that, if we say it is wrong than we must be the first people to not do that and refuse it. I don't use the CTA that frequently to say if it occurs a lot or not, rarely i don't find a place.
But what makes me think is that a lot of times, we say it's wrong but just talking, not acting, otherwise, nothing will change.

Fixing a Hole (Beatles)

I’m fixing a hole where the rain gets in
And stops my mind from wandering
Where it will go.
I’m filling in the cracks that ran through the door
And kept my mind from wandering
Where it will go.
And it really doesn’t matter if I’m wrong I’m right
Where I belong I’m right
Where I belong.
See the people standing there who disagree and never win
And wonder why they don’t get in my door.

I’m painting the room in a colorful way
And when my mind is wandering
There I will go.
And it doesn’t really matter if I’m wrong
I’m right Where I belong I’m right
Where I belong.
Silly people run around they worry me
And never ask me why they don’t get past my door.

I’m taking the time for a number of things
That weren’t important yesterday
And I still go.
I’m fixing a hole where the rain gets in
And stops my mind from wandering
Where it will go.

Under pressure

i don't know why, but in the middle of the day i just felt that i'm carrying a lot on my shoulders (i was listening to Hey Jude at that moment).
The results, the exams, the project.. just few months and all will be finished but i guess things are getting more and more harder.
I had a bad week of exams (except 2 or 3 exams), I got my results from the control (can u believe, there's still one subject not corrected yet), i feel that i have to study more for the finals to maintain the martabet el sharaf. i don't know what to do.. it's just that i want to get away from everything.
i know that always, i'm the one who is trying to be optimistic, i know that by tomorrow i would forgot about all that.. it's just that before forgetting everything, i have to let it out.
and the project, we didn't make much progress, still trying to figure out how to use the program!!!
so.. i guess that now, i'll go back to work, at least i'm feeling a little better :)

Memories

Every now and then i'll share with you something from my old past, i'll write in the title Memories.

Here's a little story that i just heard few days ago. i was with some friends from school and we were talking about the past, about our teachers, about the old days.
One of my friends told me this one, a situation that happened between the two of us, so i'm sharing it with you.
We were in the kindergarten (jardin d'enfants). We used to have a time for singing songs then they distribute some sweets before going to play in the playground.
That day, we had chipsy, 3assaleya (a candy stick) and a third thing. My friend had a tooth that was going to fall so she couldn't eat hard things. So i asked the teacher that i give her my chipsy and she gives me her 3assaleya so she has also three things like all of us.

Pope John Paul II

well, i can't say that i really knew him or all of his work. but while watching the tv, the past few days, my admiration for him grew more and more, for his life, for his achievements, for his person. how he reached and touched the heart of millions all over the world.
i can't express how i felt, but watching the funeral today, was a special thing. i was touched by everything, the atmosphere, the choir, listening to different languages..
all the world recognizes what great man he was, what message he wanted to pass.
this makes me wonder, what is my role in life? what is my quest? i guess this is what i'll try to figure it out these days.. and i'll tell u when i arrive to something.
i'm sure that everyone has his own role but it's harder to discover it than to realize it.
so, think about it.

Last but not least, here's a quote from one of my favourite books.

"En général, la mort fait que l'on devient plus attentif à la vie"

Paolo Coelho from L'alchimiste.

"In general, death makes us pay more attention to life."

(sorry for the translation if it is not that accurate).